Executive Summary:
Some divorces end smoothly with mutual agreements and a sense of closure. Others are marked by arguments, tension, and a complete breakdown in communication. If you’re in a contested divorce in Colorado where you can’t agree on anything and barely tolerate being in the same room, you’re not alone. This blog will walk you through how to handle this kind of high-conflict split. You’ll learn what a contested divorce means, why communication breakdowns make it more complicated, and strategies to protect your interests while moving your case forward. The goal is to help you reach the finish line of your divorce without adding more unnecessary conflict, so you can focus on moving forward with your life.
What Is a Contested Divorce?
A contested divorce happens when you and your spouse cannot agree on one or more major issues, such as property division, spousal support, or child custody. In Colorado, this means the court will make those decisions for you.
Unlike an uncontested divorce, where both spouses are able to sit down, agree on the details, and leave with a signed agreement, a contested divorce looks very different. This process often takes more time, costs more, and can be emotionally draining. But it also ensures that unresolved matters are settled in a fair and legally binding way so you can move forward.
Why Some Couples Cannot Communicate During Divorce
Disagreements about important issues are common during divorce, but high-conflict cases can make even basic conversations impossible. This breakdown often happens because of:
- Lingering anger or resentment
- A lack of trust over financial or parenting matters
- Completely different goals for the outcome of the divorce
- A history of unresolved conflict during the marriage
When communication is this strained, it is easy to get stuck. The key is finding ways to move forward without relying on constant direct interaction.
How to Navigate a Contested Divorce When You Cannot Talk to Your Ex
If every conversation ends in an argument or a dead end, here are some practical ways to get through a contested divorce in Colorado. Whether you live in Denver, Colorado Springs, or elsewhere, these strategies can help you keep your case moving forward.
1. Hire a Skilled Divorce Attorney
In a high-conflict contested divorce, your attorney is more than just legal representation: they are your buffer, your strategist, and your voice in the process. A skilled Colorado divorce attorney in Denver or Colorado Springs can step in so you do not have to endure tense conversations or risk saying something that could hurt your case. They will handle all communication, negotiations, and court filings, building a strategy that reflects your priorities and protects your interests.
2. Set Communication Boundaries
If every text turns into a fight or every phone call feels like a trap, it is time to set firm boundaries. Limit interactions to written messages or have all communication go through your attorneys. For parenting matters, tools like OurFamilyWizard or Talking Parents can help you exchange information and manage schedules without unnecessary contact.
3. Focus on Resolution, Not Arguments
When emotions run high, it is tempting to respond to every jab or try to “win” every disagreement. In a contested divorce, that approach can slow the process and drain your energy. Keep your focus on the real goal, which is finalizing the divorce so you can move forward with your life.
It is just as important to stay off social media when it comes to your divorce. Even posts you believe are harmless can be taken out of context, presented in court, and used to weaken your case if it is taken to trial.
4. Keep Detailed Records
In high-conflict cases, your best ally is proof. Save everything, including emails, text messages, financial statements, and any notes about exchanges or incidents. Detailed records can help your attorney respond quickly to false claims and provide the court with a clear picture of the facts. Good documentation is not about being petty; it is about protecting yourself.
5. Use Mediation When Possible
Mediation is not about repairing the relationship. It is about finding just enough common ground to move the process forward. Even in a contested divorce, mediation can resolve certain issues and save time in court. A mediator acts as a neutral third party, and you can even be in separate rooms or meet virtually. If you can agree on some matters here, it means fewer issues for the judge to decide later.
6. Prepare for the Court Process
If mediation and negotiations fail, the court will make the final decisions. Your attorney will help you prepare evidence, witness statements, and legal arguments. While going to court can be stressful, it is sometimes the only way to resolve disputes and close your case.
7. Take Care of Your Well-Being
A contested divorce can take a toll on your mental, emotional, and physical health. Make time for the things that keep you grounded, whether that is exercising, connecting with supportive friends, or simply taking a break from all things divorce-related. The better you care for yourself, the stronger you will be for the legal process ahead.
Moving Forward After a Contested Divorce
A contested divorce in Colorado can feel overwhelming, especially when every interaction with your spouse seems to spark more conflict. At Colorado Legal Group, we take on the stressful parts so you can focus on building the next chapter of your life. From handling tough negotiations to representing you in court, our team in Denver and Colorado Springs is here to guide you through the process with clarity and confidence.
If you are ready to put the conflict behind you and move forward, contact us today to schedule a confidential consultation. Let’s take that first step toward your future together.